OK, I completely understand the nervousness of historical scourges.

We think that death is around the corner. Be it terrorists, airplane crashes, or just some good ol’ fashioned drive by shootings. It’s the natural result of over mothering or the overly protective father who views any future boyfriends of his 4 year old daughter as rapists.

Seriously, though, we need to take a step back and enforce reality checks.

From a Reuters article the following quote:

“Infectious diseases are now spreading geographically much faster than at any time in history,” the WHO said.

It said it was vital to keep watch for new threats like the emergence in 2003 of SARS, or Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome, which spread from China to 30 countries and killed 800 people.

“It would be extremely naive and complacent to assume that there will not be another disease like AIDS, another Ebola, or another SARS, sooner or later,” the report warned.

1) Much faster than at any time in history:

I think the dead people of the plague would differ. I think the spanish flu dead would differ. I could go on and on.

2) the emergence in 2003 of SARS…which killed 800 people.

Come the fuck on! 800 people?

That’s now the definition of a disastrous epidemic? Who the fuck are we hiring at CDC these days? Morons?

3) AIDS, Ebola, and SARS are linked as some new age spanish flu or plague.

First, it should be offensive to compare SARS to AIDS. 800 people!!!!!!!

Ebola? Um, we’re still in the neighborhood of hundreds, not millions.

Sure, to the people that died it sucks. But for the danger it provokes towards human existence, not so much.

Even AIDS… Really a slow moving killer in terms of the wipeout of Indian populations due to Smallpox blankets.

What’s more, AIDS is entirely preventable.

If people simply gave up irresponsible activity its victims would be far removed from millions.

Who the fuck are these CDC morons?

Who cares!

What’s important is to look soberly at the threats that are out there and realize that comparably from a historical perspective they are shark bites or lightning strikes.

Sucks for the people that are affected, but not the end of civilization as we know it.

So the next time you are sitting next to a pidgeon that coughs and sneezes, realize that you have a greater chance to win the lottery than to die from some worldwide destructive epidemic.

Enjoy that martini, knowing that it won’t be your last.

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